Christian Matrimonials

By Morgana Rae A

 ”Love is not love which alters when it alteration finds.” William Shakespeare

First the facts: John M. Gottman, PhD, the country’s foremost relationship expert, found that what set apart marriages that succeeded (as opposed to the 67% of first marriages that ended in divorce) was a 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interactions. He found that even the little things counted–a smile, a pat, a “thank you.” This magic ratio isn’t confined to marriage. The same story applies to all relationships.*

Here’s my favorite tool for an instant relationship upgrade: Appreciation Loops. You can use them any time you like, in any relationship, without conditions. You can feel a shift in the dynamic immediately.

Appreciation loops go like this: Take a moment to say to your partner, “What I appreciate about you is…” and fill in the end of the sentence. Honesty is crucial. Try this without planning or even knowing where your sentence is going to end. See what comes up.

The power of this practice lies in its independence from the other person’s action. Your appreciation is not contingent on your partner’s behavior. You are not saying “I would appreciate you if…” Nothing is more powerful than not trying to change the other.

Instead, appreciation works like a railroad switch for when you’re going down the wrong track: “We interrupt this regularly scheduled unhappiness to focus on the positive!”

Notice how unnatural this feels in the middle of conflict and insecurity. What becomes possible when you face your partner and say “What I appreciate about you is…”? When you change your focus to the positive, your world changes.

Using this practice when the relationship is already thriving is like building a bank account to draw on later.

“Beyond ideas of right-doing and wrong-doing there’s a field. Will you meet me there?”
Rumi

*This practice is not intended to “fix” a toxic relationship. Any relationship in which violence, drug abuse, or mental health problems are involved needs assistance from appropriate professionals.

Morgana Rae, an internationally acclaimed expert on wealth manifestation, is the owner of Charmed Life Coaching, a successful life and business coaching company that guides entrepreneurs to attract more than they chase, market effectively and inexpensively, and to RADICALLY change their Relationship with Money. Grab your FREE MONEY MAGNET MP3 at http://www.abundanceandprosperity.com. Contact Morgana at http://www.abundanceandprosperity.com.

Understanding Guys In A Relationship

By dmytro fedosev

 In the world today, guys are taking a major role when it comes to relationships. The view that mens role is grooming themselves to be the head of the family no longer takes centre stage. Relationships can either be casual, friendly or intimate. The friendly type, involves no commitment just acquaintances with close friends. Casual relations entails acknowledgement of ones desires for the other but does not necessary involve any sense of obligation. The duration may last a day to years depending on the understanding between both parties. Affairs that are intimate are committal in nature and the parties are bound by love. It can either be long or short term depending on the compatibility of those involved.

Guys in relationships tend to want freedom to do what they like at their own time. Any kind of restriction to this, often leads to conflicts or broken relations. Manly, is the right word to use to describe what they want. It makes them happy to be the man, feel strong and confident. They like to be in control and this should not be mistaken for jealousy. On the contrary its more of affection than suspicion.

Views on dating tend to be the same in most cases though not all. Guys tend to be territorial by wanting to have knowledge of all that is happening around them. In short, being in charge is their pride and joy. The happiness of a partner is their main concern and everything they do is centred on this. They like a relationship kept alive even after a couple of months. Their key is to feel loved and appreciated.

Male anxiety is a term used to describe the anxiousness and self-consciousness of a guy. Mostly, it is performance related, involving sexuality. A guy may not be fully satisfied with his sex life with their partner. This creates anxiety resulting in low self esteem which makes him pull away from the affair. The presence of anxiety in most cases is a sign that there are issues that need resolving. Lack of this may result in further problems for the couple in terms of their relationship. Discussion of feelings and emotions is often not done by men unless they are fully committed and open in a relationship. Assurance that their partner will stick with them in good and bad times confirms the love she has and the relationship is sure to last.

Pulished by: guys in relationships, views on dating, male anxiety

How To Make A Relationship Last

By Harrold Carter

 Many women struggle to understand why their last relationship has failed or how to get back on track in their current one. Too many times we just say that we must have picked the wrong person or we just can not get along with anyone. Many women forget that we have the ability with in ourselves to either make a good decision or a bad one. Of course, women want to make the best decisions all the time. Unfortunately this is not always the case. If you really want to understand why you can’t make a relationship work or you are committed to making your current one last, you need to give 100% of yourself to the effort of improving your relationships. You need to be willing to look at not your partner but with in your own self to see what you need to work on.

You need to learn to be much disciplined in regards to yourself. Regardless of your hectic day or how well you slept last night you must constantly be aware of the manner in which you’re speaking to your partner. This can be the actual words you say, your tone or your pattern of speech. You need to remember that unprovoked harsh or rude speech is never okay and you have no excuse. You need to not let your anger or annoyance at outside situations bleed into your relationship and cause you to unleash on your partner. While is it part of your partner’s responsibility to be your friend and sounding board through tough times, they should never be your emotional punching bag.

Your ego must always come in a distant second to the importance of your relationship. Those couples who have long with standing relationships have let their egos completely go. Many women just like to say that they are stubborn, like it or not. Unfortunately most of the time you will have a partner that chooses the latter. Really what they are being is selfish and inflexible which will only lead to a lonely life. This attitude will turn people away and is the cause of a great deal of issues that happen with in relationships.

Being committed to your own growth as a person can only enhance the quality of your relationship you must know yourself before you can let anyone else really know you. This is done through a constant process of questioning, learning and discovering. Not only about relationships but about how to properly communicate with your partner. You need to be able to really tap into what your partner is feeling instead of being so focused on what is going on your own mind. This will lead to a deep respect for each other that will help in those times when you do disagree. It will enable to work out your differences in a calm, controlled way.

Basically to be able to make a relationship last for the long haul you and your partner need to be a team. Teams stick together until the end of the game and always have their eye on the finish line. The masters of relationships know that it is a continuous process and takes constant work. You have to keep up the maintenance on your relationship just as you do a vehicle. If you neglect it you will start to have problems. Let those problems fester too long and the whole thing will stop functioning all together. Many times when a relationship has reached this point of decay it is not possible to get it back.

Harrold Carter is a popular author who also writes about golf clothing and gambling.

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